ViceZilla’s Views

NIAGARA FALLS, N.Y. , A man apparently trying to sneak into the United States was rescued from an ice floe less than a mile upstream from Niagara Falls, authorities said.
Guards from Ontario Power Generation said they heard the man screaming for help at about 4:30 a.m. Saturday near the company’s water intakes near Chippawa, Ontario.
“If he hadn’t been discovered,” said Peter Larsen, a control operator at the intakes, “he would have gone through one of those gates and then very likely could have been swept over the falls.”
Rescuers in boats plucked the shivering man from the ice floe and got him ashore.
Authorities said the unidentified 42-year-old man had an inflatable air mattress with him and was apparently trying to get to the United States. The ice chunk he was on apparently broke loose.
The man was treated for mild hypothermia before being charged by Canadian immigration authorities.

Why in the world would anybody trying to sneak into the United States think it wise to do it by going over Niagara Falls? Attempting this just proves him to be a mental midget. But attempting it with an air mattress just proves that he is in fact an idiot!

Unfortunately he was rescued before going over the edge, meaning his gene pool, as thin as it seems to be, remains intact.

Tags: Musings //